as expected the women are been overly sentimental, ganging up on the guy insulting, and throwing reason out the window. !I've been married for ten long miserable years to a wife I never loved. Many of us are (heavily) pregnant and still working. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. There are many things that may cause a broken heart. Couldn't have said it any better And me too guys. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. THE MOTHER KNOWS THE FATHER DOESNT LOVE HER NOW GUESS WHAT SHE IS ALSO MISARABLE! There are reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else that will remind you to be true to yourself. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has Hi all. I feel that i have fallen into serious depression and i might seek some professional help. I JUST came here to vent not telling people I'm snobby or lazy which I've never been! Men don't have a biological clock in the same sense as women. You CAN NOT let someone have the upper hand on you. He made a baby with you but doesn't seem to support you financially and you don't live together. What kind of advice do you really want, the best advice would be to take care of your baby, dont let yours and your other half (lool) silly selves to pollute her upbringing. 2) Are you prepared to forego this child and create a loving family with someone you truly love (which means you will wait for this new love to bear you a child).but be completely guilty all your life to abandon your first newborn just because you dont love your girlfriend. He shdnt forget the welfare of the child involved. I unfortunately love my ex I have tried to forgets my ex but I can't. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness. but she didn't have her baby . know it's right to give her the fact straight but she is just a really nice person, and I feel really **** you know! Unless your girlfriend deems fine that you both do not continue the relationship, by all means.". maybe take a pre-marital class and figure out some common ground to build a relationship on Nine years ago I was mad in love with my first boyfriend. After a little while, if you still feel the same (i.e. Its been almost 5yrs. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. think twice before sharing personal details, foster a friendly and supportive environment, remove fake accounts, spam and misinformation, delete posts that violate our community guidelines, reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts. I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. In fact, I was planning on breaking up with him right before I found out I was pregnant. Best of luck. I am 39 soon to be 40 in 2 months. Help :(. You don't even love him. we ended u divorcing in 6 years anyway. back out now, "Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. You could have the best partner and tons of family support. As for my girlfriend, I love this person and i will do my best to make it work out. I'm a **** if I lie and say I love her and be with her. Don't get me wrong here, my daughter can destroy with the best of them. K lemme get one thing straight. They had to do it because the marriage was arranged or demanded, as their families saw them as a burden and financial responsibility to be passed on to a man who was willing to take her off their hands. SCENARIO 3: FORGET ABOUT THE WOMAN YOU LOVE. Hi everyone! NOW THE CHILD IS BORN. I think it's so hard for me to love this baby because I don't love my partner. To help you make the fewest blunders possible, let me give you a few tips: 1. This may not change her decision, but best to be honest. I really don't want to mess this child's life up. He pays for the stuff bc he can afford too and didn't want me working while pregnant which was fine when everything was good. He is a grown up. Even though you never had the intention to have a serious relationship with your current partner, you still need to discuss the problem with him. Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. Long story short, I don't love my pregnant girlfriend. In other words, those maternal. But I don't feel the need to hold that up as a shield (though every time I see a movie where the childless woman is the villain I understand why my fellow non-parents doth protest too much . She is 6 months pregnant now. Accept That You Will Never Be First. It may be tolerable now, but it sounds like you are unhappy. ISNT THAT WHAT WE ALL WANT? Long story short my ex dumped me. After a while it was better but even now when we get into arguments he's so controlling and condescending it just makes me like him less and less. If you have the "baby blues" you might not notice the sadness or moodiness right away. Sex is the leading cause of babies. Good luck. Where are you from? Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. One slight problem I don't love her! Also, if it's bad now it will only get worse once the baby is here. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. There are more than likely services in your area to help you get on your feet (welfare,food stamps,shelter). Okay so long story very short my ex gi Long story short, My current girlfriend keeps in contact wit Long story short. This educational content is not medical or diagnostic advice. If you've only been together 3 mos, where did you live before you met? The episode was written by Jennifer Crittenden and . You could be the best, healthiest, most well adjusted person. You need a job and a plan so that you don't get stuck with him forever. Eventually though, it caught up to us. CLICK HERE to subscribe to our daily up-to-date news!! It would feel odd. And when the oldest child was about 10, I finally left. Remember, the decision you make will decide whether you will be happy or not in the near future. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. @Teejay,hahahahaha, that cracked me up, but coming back to the issue, what da hell???? Birth control, as the objection went, could actually serve to raise the abortion rate by encouraging people not ready to have children to have sex at the risk, however small, of becoming. Being in a loveless relationship is not a good example for the LO you already have and the one on the way. Ive just seen your reply and am unhappoy in my relationship but dont want to end it for the kids sake! She actually is (5 months now), but I took all the words back (the reasons why I didn't want to be with her). Hey I know exactly how you feel. SHE DESERVES A SAYING IN THIS! So, maybe try to establish a relationship with your baby now, stick it out for a year or so (w/o getting married), then once you've bonded w/the kid and proven you are a devoted dad, split up w/GF and file for custody. Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. I don't know if your feelings of disconnection will pass but I sure hope they do. I just don't think it's right to bring a child into the world when you can see the end of the relationship. Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy. Mia, the fascinating thing about postpartum depression and anxiety is that it isn't logical. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. Nothing from the start. It's stressful I have strong feelings for him and he says he does to but it's not just are little fantasy anymore things got so rushed and our maturity levels are so different. "And Maggie Makes Three" is the thirteenth episode of the sixth season of the American animated television series The Simpsons. Now she's pregnant. Will you make a better progress by doing so? As I said earlier, each person has different needs. We literally virtually broke up the night before! It does make someone feel down and stressed out but, look at the big picture. My two oldest remember some fighting and the divorce. Chandra is a mom of three boys (8, 4, and 3) and the founder of Oh Lovely Day, a lifestyle blog with a honest look at motherhood.She is trying to create more of an open dialogue with a no . That showed up as a third factor." Sadly having a baby can create a rift between parents. Here Are 10 Behaviors A Woman Exhibits When She's In Love 1. So family pressured us to get married. Aim to have a better and best partner that you can have. I grew up where my dad treated me like ****, so I wanted to be the best father I could. They finally divorced when I was 19. But, learning from the past and making it as a lesson is a different story. We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. I just need to vent and I thought this would be a good place to do it. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? My greatest concern is the child. . By Simon Maybin. Dont ever sleep with any girl you are not sure abt. Likewise, it's also draining, frustrating, and time-consuming. Whether the mistake were made with or without your intention, it still your mistake anyway. A cesarean birth, which accounts for 21% of births today, costs around. Purposely avoiding sex is a great time to have your own awakening Not having sex can be a. I completely respect her decision on this. A woman isn't damaged after engaging in sex, having a baby, or ending a bad relationship. Because, you are not allowing yourself to have a better relationship, at least with your own self. Please specify a reason for deleting this reply from the community. Man and woman making love in bed. SHE WILL ALSO HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO THINK ABOUT WHAT'S BEST FOR HER CHILD. FATHER IS BLESSED WITH A CHILD BUT MISARABLE. The preferential parent is a parent who loves one child, the " golden child ," but doesn't love the other (or others), a " scapegoat .". Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. OK LETS TRY TO LOOK AT WHAT IS: IS ANYONE THINKING ABOUT THIS FROM THE CHILD PERSPECTIVE? Please specify a reason for deleting this reply from the community. Plan the best decision that both of you can have to take a good care of the baby. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. And the same with me. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. Have you told him you're pregnant yet? I'm having a baby with someone I'm not in love with. She has someone who depends solely on her. SCENARIO 1: STAY WITH HER BECUASE SHE IS PREGNANT (THIS IS THE FOUNDATION OF THE RELATIONSHIP). First step: Don't rush things. I am at a loss as to what I must do. This is nuts. He is capable of choosing to be with you and not having a child with you, or leaving if he decides he wants a child more. Mary Morris Former Bookkeeper Author has 285 answers and 1.6M answer views 2 y He just has a side I don't like. "Once you cross that line, look for life to get easier in every way. cos it not easy to becme a single mother huh. I FEEL SORRY FOR THE GIRL INVOLVED. Archived discussions are usually a bit older and not as active as other community content. He started cheating and I would cry myself to sleep. I would start making a game plan, create a change. Long story as short as possible! That doesn't mean you give up your relationship w/the child, you will have to share custody, and likely pay support (unless you have the kid more than she does, but that's rare). My pregnant girlfriend doesnt seem to want me around. Especially in your baby's life! ALL THIS TRANSLATE TO THE CHILD. You could split amicably and try to remain friends to do what's best for the child. WTF re u saying tat u will nt marry her if I was tat gal u will marry by force so tat when u die n return u will fu*k people that u love total rubbish.Now u want freedom my ass u wont get so whos gonna to marry ur baby mommy?? Most were married to . View woman having a baby videos Browse 599,438 woman having a baby stock photos and images available, or search for woman in labor or woman giving birth to find more great stock photos and pictures. Don't feel guilty if you're not in a constant state of love and bliss when you have a new baby. I dont want to jump into marriage as if its a job contract I am signing expecting that one day it will expire. But there's a catch: Because you believe that having this child means more to you than not having this child means to your husbandand because he had originally agreed to three kidsyour. I don't get how you came to that conclusion and you are just a bitter girl that Last updated on June 9, 2022 by Michelle Devani There are many things that may cause a broken heart. Maybe he doesn't like being used. Create an account or log in to participate. Time to grow up! AND THIS ALSO INCLUDES AN UNHAPPY CHILD. You will need to end an unwanted relationship. Married for few months. Good luck to you. Take public transportation until you can get your own car and focus on your baby. This is why i found it hard to break up with her although I'd thought about it many times in the past. He's not in love so he's selfish??? Asking why you had sex with her in the first place wont solve this problem cos its everywhere in our societies and its just unfortunate your hit and run opportunity couldnt worked out. A year has passed, we have a beautiful little girl that I love with all my heart, but our marriage life is a disaster. not the father, mother or child. After I really got to know him without drinking and partying, I found out I didn't like his personality. How I wish she can understand and let me leave my life and be free. We didn't have to be. Only good thing that came out of it are my children. Why would you do that? Nobody forces you to live with him, if you really don't like him, you can find a job and leave. Begin speaking about the kids, as well, mentioning different accomplishments they've made lately . Babies can put stress on a couple because it requires both mom and dad to give of themselves. You moved into his house, you let him buy you a car and you quit your job because he was financial there. There is no right way to be a parent there is the only way that you want to do it. Yes, her hormones will be out of whack. Having a baby is a life-changing experience and many want to ensure they do it at a time that is right for them. She has done nothing wrong and I feel I am just going to destroy her life! I honestly could not ever think of missing out on this child's growing up, especially the early stages. HERE YOU GIVE A CHANCE FOR THE MOTHER, THE CHILD, THE FATHER AND THE GIRLFRIEND AT HAPPINESS IN LIFE. (11 Possible Meanings), how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby, reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else, How to Sweep A Cancer Man Off His Feet - Zodiac Signs, 32 Best Reasons to Date a Nurse (The No.1 Caretaker), Things You Need to Know About Dating Portuguese Man (The Sexiest Boyfriend), 35 Crazy and Undeniable Signs That She Friendzoned You, 25 Reasons Why You Should Date The Outgoing Introvert, Reasons to Choose the Girl with the Complicated Pastand How to Love Her Right. She may have decided against an abortion thinking you will still be with her, but if not, TELL HER it is over and you will not be involved with her anymore (except of course whatever involvement you ahve with the child, support and custody-wise). Do I have to spend the rest of my life with a woman I don't love? I have heard that arranged marriages actually have a better long term outcome because of this. After all, a 70-year-old guy can still have kids. I got pregnant and was pressured to get married. The man I am pregnant by has been in my life for years and is a good man but I am not in love with him. He will probably try to then use the baby against you. We keep them up because there are a ton of great conversations here and we believe you deserve to see them all. I hope everything works out for you. Congratulations, a new bundle of joy is coming to fill your home with love and bliss. I don't know what I'm asking for, I'm just venting at the moment. He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. I too feel torn by a similar situation. Think about it if you can't love him ever then end it and learn to co parent. After having a baby, a woman will be, on average, 2.5 to 5 lbs. I was in the same boat. Your best bet might be to stay with your gf for now, bond with your child and forge a relationship with him/her. Idnt also think the said mother would marry someone who wouldnt make her happy. We don't have to be together to love our children. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. Aside from personal decision to have an unwanted relationship and questioning such question of having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it, we will need to be responsible. Sometimes people make choices to abort, adopt, or keep the child. More answers below Quora User Managing Partner (Solicitor) & Mechanical Engineer Author has 20.3K answers and 10.7M answer views 1 y Personally, I think you should only have sex with people you are in love with. This is why friends with benefits is never a good idea. Good one boys real mature!! I'm curious as to how he is selfish?? Be true to yourself and you will allow yourself to get things that you deserve. Glancing over my shoulder in a coffee shop, I saw a couple of women, both bouncing perfectly content babies on their laps. Steve. there will be hatred, resentment, and misery. They were always fighting. On the contrary, women have been forced to marry men they didn't love for centuries. IS THAT WHAT SHE/HER DESERVES A GARANTEED **** UP ENVRIOMENT? In the end its all about the kids. And a bit frightening. When a woman loves you, she's kind to you. . Sucked it up and did what I had to do for my kids. I chose to divorce my husband and my boyfriend of 4yrs has now ditched meit's also the consequence for the actions that I chose GET OUT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1. He's controlling. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. The guy I was seeing was fun to party with but I didn't love him. My father married my mother when she became pregnant times were different then of course. As opposed to hanging out with friends and other men she isn't in love with, she may be much more outgoing and boisterous. But kids are smarter than you think. How can I believe I fathered the child if she's been unfaithful ? Even when you first meet your new child, don't put expectations on how you should feel. Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. Don't just jump into the discussion; ease your way into it. Though they don't have a child, Oprah and Stedman have been together for decades and have no intention of being married. Does the father know? Paula Perry has a multi-page spreadsheet titled "Squirrels," which details the health and wellness of tiny, injured baby squirrels she keeps in her house. As a matter of fact, there are many mental, emotional, and social side effects associated with being a young-faced woman. And in some cases, she may want to keep the baby, but you don't. But what do you do in this situation? Subscribe to Medium for only $5/month & read ALL my sizzling hot stories! First, she's too far along. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one. NOW YOU WONT BE ALWAYS PHYSICALLY THERE, BUT BECUASE YOU ARE A HAPPY PERSON THAT WILL TRANSLATE THAT. Chosing to be in a rebound relationship to forget the past and aiming for some fun also cause a problem.
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